s3e07: Review

Episode 7: Lone Star Directed by Frank Pierson Written by Elizabeth Ziff Helena has one scene with Dylan in this episode and it's a great one. Is it my favourite so far? No, but I liked it... a lot. ;) I couldn't help noticing that there's an annoying sound, like a beeping when trucks reverse, that occurs intermittently thoughout this scene. Stop it already! I also noticed that Dylan was dressed more like a str8 woman, she was showing some cleavage (well a lot actually and I'm not complaining) but that top looked all wrong. Why would she be dressing straighter now when she dressed like a dyke in the last episode? I don't know. Not that Helena ever dresses like a dyke, but then she doesn't look like one and Dylan does. The scene starts with Helena animatedly talking to her kids in New York via webcam on her Apple Mac. Dylan knocks and enters her office then rather presumptously says hello and tells the kids that she can't wait to meet them. That causes a shocked look from Helena but she warms to the intrusion when Dylan gives her a gift bag. The contents are perfect for a Brit away from home; a Cadbury's flake (there is nothing like Cadbury's chocolate, American chocolate really does pale in comparison) and a jar of Branston pickle. I don't like pickle as a rule, I always ditch the pickle asap when I have a burger, but I do love Branston because it's sweet. It goes perfectly in a cheese sandwich. I wonder if Rachel had any say in what the gifts were. Helena's kiss on the cheek in thanks for Dylan's gift is not what Dylan was hoping for in response to her gift (we can see that just from her expression), and she doesn't let her focus drift when Helena asks her how the editing's going. Helena: [walking away from Dylan, having extricated herself from Dylan's embrace] How goes editing? Dylan: You haven't called me. Helena: You know Dylan, I made a promise to myself to um.. stop sleeping with married people. Dylan: [approaching Helena, then sitting on the desk in front of her] Danny's my boyfriend. We're not married. We live together. Helena: But in lesbian world.... that is married. [walking away from Dylan] I've wanted to call you but... this is a really difficult situation for me you know. You're with someone else.. and you're straight. At least that's what you told me. Dylan: I am straight. Helena: Dylan, this is a no win on my part. What starts in chaos ends in chaos. Dylan: [closes her eyes, sighs, then moves towards Helena who retreats but is trapped in front of the door so poor Helena in her own office has "nowhere to run to baby, nowhere to hide"] I like you... a lot! Helena: What does that mean Dylan? Dylan: [pushes Helena against the door (oh I say!) and starts to kiss Helena, who I have to say does not protest too loudly at first] Helena: [pushes Dylan away from her] I don't wanna be the lie you tell to someone. Dylan: [shaking her head] Well, what do you want? Helena: You know what I want... [stroking Dylan's cheek] I don't want it half way and I don't want it at someone else's expense. [raises her finger to Dylan's lips as Dylan tries to kiss her again] We should just be friends, can we try that? The answer to Helena's question is in the look in Dylan's eyes; a big fat 'No'. Next week's trailer proves the fact. They're both in their undies and Dylan is giving chase again, this time chasing Helena into bed. Yipeee! I just have to ask the question, who's been editing Helena's lines? Or should it be 'Who's been editing Helena's lines, lines, lines?' Since when does she drop words 'How goes editing?' and 'This is a no win'. Did adding the word 'situation' seem superfluous? Is this normal for Helena? I don't think so. After all, she speaks the Queen's English properly, like what I do. ;-) I'm blaming the writer because I can, okay I've been waiting to say that because this episode was written by Elizabeth Ziff, who was responsible for the repetitive score in season two, two, two and that damn theme tune tune tune. So, I feel it's my duty to blame her for something. I know there was a lot of trepidation when it was announced that she was the writer of this episode. She does the music, appears in the show, is a producer, and now even writes. It's a wonder she doesn't clean the lavs as well. I wonder what other people thought of her efforts. I don't know yet as I don't like to read or hear about other people's thoughts on an episode until I have formulated my own. Yes, this is a tamper proof train of thought on The L Word. But let's get back to the good stuff. Once again I can't say enough good things about Alexandra Hedison. Not only is she incredibly gorgeous she is a damn fine actress. She plays the scene perfectly. Her attraction to Helena is very real. I love the way she literally pursues Helena around her office, finally pushing her against the door and kissing her. Interestingly enough Alexandra it seems is unaware of just how gorgeous she is, in interviews she comments on how beautiful Rachel Shelley is and jokes how it's unfair that anyone has to share screen time with her. As much as I like Rachel, when Alexandra is on screen I know who I'd rather be watching and it's not Rachel. Alexandra Hedison herself (according to recent interviews in She and Curve magazines that I read on her fan site) echoes the thoughts of many fans of the show, when she comments on the strangeness of the fact that she (a lesbian) is playing Dylan, an allegedly str8 woman who looks gay, whereas Rachel Shelley (who Alexandra says is very str8) is playing a lesbian. But let's not judge a book by its cover. While I can see her point, it is certainly true in my experience that a lot of lesbians have lead seemingly normal heterosexual life for decades, often with marriage and kids coming into play. I admit that it is rather baffling for a gold star such as myself, to imagine how it is possible to do all this and reach your 30s or 40s before the penny finally drops. Christ, I can remember lusting after Lindsay Wagner as The Bionic Woman when I was but a child. Apparently denial is a river in Egypt. No, but seriously though, some people just don't realise for ages. They need to be hit over the head with a labrys, have Sharon Stone make eyes at them on the big screen or of course fall in love before they cotton on. The other point in favour of having a lesbian play straight is that there should be as many lesbians as possible on The L Word, but only those who can act please. And finally, please note that this episode was directed by an octagenarian!